#and then Hardison for four years after that continued to tell her anyways

[independent-fics]

Never forgetting in episode 2(!) of Leverage (that early on!!) Parker stole a law in total view of the House of Representatives and Hardison said she was going to be a legend. And then she proceeded to be just that.

[dtrhwithalex]

TV | Leverage (Season 2, Rewatch)

Rewatch of the second season of TNT's LEVERAGE (2008-2012), created by John Rogers and Chris Downey together with Dean Devlin and his production company Electric Entertainment.

In anticipation of the show's reboot / revival / sequel LEVERAGE: REDEMPTION coming to IMDbTV on 09 July this year, I am rewatching the original 77 episodes and writing about my favourite moments and things from each episode, season by season.

201: THE BEANTOWN BAILOUT JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS. Original Air Date: 15 July 2009.

We here at the Rabbit Hole adore the Beantown Bailout Job very much (and by we I mean me). It is such a great season-opener and everything about it sets up the season so nicely. Also let me just say, I love the cheesy intro. I like to imagine that this plays on whatever website the clients usually end up finding the team. It would be so confusing. And wonderful.

This episode, of course, also introduces another of my favourite characters: Lt. Patrick Bonanno, State Police. And I am very sad that there is zero chance we'll ever get to see him in the reboot, since the wonderful Robert Blanche has unfortunately passed away last year. Bonanno was such a fantastic addition to this show and I love him very much. He is just brilliant in every episode he is in.

Aside from the introduction of Bonanno, Beantown is a brilliant episode for various reasons, but I wanna talk about this one most of all. John Rogers talked about this on his blog, I think -- not one member of the team can come straight out and admit that they need the others. It is the impromptu meeting at Sophie's performance that brings them together again (very much against Nate's best attempts). Only once they're at McRory's and Parker suggests stealing something to cheer up Sophie is when they all fess up and tell Nate that they want this team back together again. And then, of course, we have one of my favourite sequences in this entire show: Nate forcefully being bullied back into this family. They do exactly what he did to them in The Second David Job -- they get him to contribute knowledge to the case that they, allegedly, lack. And he knows what they're doing, of course, he's not an idiot. Well played, indeed.

I would also like to personally thank one Nadine Haders, this show's most brilliant costume designer, for every single piece of clothing she put on Christian Kane for this episode. That green sweater with the brown jeans jacket? All my love to you, Nadine. All of it. Also, uncharacteristically, Nate has some very good looks in this episode (the man looks healthy for once!) and I am unreasonably mad about it (actually, he has some very good looks this entire season).

One last thing: I would like to have a word with whoever decided to play the Andy Lange song here that Sophie's departure in The Two Live Crew Job is set to. It makes this first half of the season a circle. Who do I need to have words with? Who?

202: THE TAP-OUT JOB

D: MARC ROSKIN. W: ALBERT KIM. Original Air Date: 22 July 2009.

An absolutely amazing episode for Eliot but also very much for Sophie. They are the Conference Of Mom Friends, and I adore them very much, thank you. It is a fantastic episode for them individually, but especially also for the specific relationship these two people have. There is an amazing post floating around on this website (this one here) talking exactly about this episode and Eliot and Sophie in the role of protectors in their team, their family.

There are a few scenes here that I really like and really, most of them are about or with Eliot. I love in the briefing at the hotel that Eliot does not just dismiss Sophie's misunderstanding of wrestling, but takes the time to explain to her what the sport is about -- and she listens. We also here get a nice glimpse at the fact that Eliot teaches them certain fighting skills and self-defence techniques, which I just love so much. Just as Sophie coaches them all in their grifts, he makes sure that they all have a certain know-how in fighting and protecting themselves. It's so good.

I am also very fond of both the moment where Eliot brings Sophie to the restaurant to meet with Rucker, but also Sophie showing up at the gym at night to talk to Eliot while he's preparing for the fight against Tank. Eliot gives away so much of himself in this episode, and it is very interesting to me that the person he does this with is, continually, Sophie. The others may be on comms, and might be, for all we know, listening in, but it is Sophie he tells these things to. It's like Hardison says later in The Two Live Crew Job: "We trust Nate to make sure the plan works, we trust you (Sophie) to make sure we're all okay." While I would not necessarily call Sophie the heart of the group (that's Hardison), she is very much the emotional centre of it.

This episode is also just very lovely to see how they all take to an environment that is, for once, not big city life. Eliot takes to it immediately, which makes sense, because he probably is from a town not much different from this one. Parker, somehow, fits in immediately as well (I love her I <3 Nebraska shirt). I feel like Nate never has any issues fitting in anywhere, he just takes things as they come. It is Hardison and Sophie who have difficulties -- Sophie because she is, after all, a bit posh and needs certain standards met, and Hardison because his world of technology does not mix well with a small, rural Midwestern town ("Can't hack a hick" anyone?).

203: THE ORDER 23 JOB

D: ROD HARDY. W: CHRIS DOWNEY. Original Air Date: 29 July 2009.

I occasionally see some posts on here that call what the team does to Charles Dodgson in 512: The White Rabbit Job the worst thing the team does to a mark. I have to say, objectively, I think what they do to Eddie Maranjian in this episode is much worse. Of course, Dodgson is a good person, and Eddie is a crook, but still. Objectively? This episode is more evil.

Anyway, this episode has some fantastic moments that I adore a whole lot. I love Eliot and Hardison as cops, Sophie's act is absolutely amazing, and I have a super soft spot for both Nate teaching Parker what he is doing, and also Eliot and his side quest of helping Randy.

I am so incredibly fond of all these little moments where Parker's eventual role of Mastermind is already being planted. She always asks Nate questions, if she doesn't have a part to play in the con, she is with Nate, learning. She says it in the pilot episode already: "I'm really good at one thing, only one thing, that's it. But you, you know other things, and I can't stop doing my one thing, can't retire." And then she does her best to learn the other things Nate knows. This episode particularly, how Nate explains to her how NLP works, that what he is selling is fear. Nate is so patient with her, too. I love them both so very much.

Eliot's side quest with Randy and his abusive dad is an absolutely excellent addition to this episode. Especially after the previous Eliot-centric episode, this small thing just goes to show that, at their core, these are good people. Yes, they are criminals, the lot of them. But they are not bad people. Things like this just make me think that, it had to have been this exact combination of people Dubenich put together. Any other thief, any other hacker, and Nate would have walked away from this alone. It had to be Parker, Hardison and Eliot for this to work exactly as it did. And Eliot looking out for Randy even though they are in the middle of a con, taking his time to make sure Bob, the U.S. Marshall goes to see Randy, is exactly something that brings this point home.

Lastly, I adore that everyone shows up at the court house when Eddie goes to find his money. He knows they all conned him, but they know no one is ever going to believe him. It's a fantastic gloat scene. And I also really love that Nate explains why this works to the others: "So, here's everything you need to know about criminal law. Every crime has two elements, Actus reus, the act itself, and mens rea, Literally "The Guilty Mind." ... Now, for escape, the prisoner has to both break out of custody and show the intent to escape. ... Which brings us back to our friend Eddie and how the brain reacts to fear. In the heat of the moment Eddie didn't ask himself a simple question, who would doubt his guilty mind?"

204: THE FAIRY GODPARENTS JOB

D: JONATHAN FRAKES. W: AMY BERG. Original Air Date: 05 August 2009.

This one was Bernie Madoff inspired, if I recall correctly, who was arrested in 2008, around the time Berg, Downey and Rogers were already bouncing ideas back and forth for this season.

There is so much to love in this episode! Where to even begin. Maybe with Parker replacing Sophie at the client meeting? Or Sophie immediately heading for both popcorn and the cookie tin after the breakup? How about Parker perching on Eliot's arm rest with her food? Nate's headmaster act? Eliot as Coach Brewer (red is a fantastic colour on him, thank you Nadine)? Hipster rich newlyweds Parker and Hardison? The return of my beloved FBI fools McSweetheart and Taggert? Taggert being McSweetheart's biggest supporter in his affection for Parker? Sophie and Widmark? The actual science-sical with all these adorable kids singing about science?

So much to love. Chock-full of greatness, this episode. Also Frakes, once again, directed the hell outta this. I love this episode so very much.

One moment that does, however, absolutely win out over everything else, is the scene at Nate's apartment after Hardison and Parker meet McSweeten and Taggert again:

Eliot: One of you two can identify the gunman, right? Hardison: Oh, yeah, sure. He stopped and let me take a picture of him as I was chasing him. Eliot: Hey, you know what, man? I've been around little kids all day. I don't need to come home and do all this crap.

That line, Mr Spencer? "I don't need to come home and do all this crap"? Home? Sir, we are four episodes into the second season, and you are already calling Nate's apartment home. Honestly, that boy has been invested into this group as a family from the moment Hardison hands him a check in the pilot episode, if not earlier. And I am very much here for all of it.

205: THE THREE DAYS OF THE HUNTER JOB

D: MARC ROSKIN. W: MELISSA GLENN & JESSICA RIEDER (GRASL). Original Air Date: 12 August 2009.

This is another one of those episodes which, when I think about it, I am not entirely into, but then when I watch it, I always love it. It's a brilliant episode, but the mark rubs me in all the wrong ways and I think that's why my general reaction to this episode in theory is mostly "ew". Which I think is kind of the point, as well.

There is much to love in this episode, though. Sophie being Nate in this one, Nate being very wary of this concept and also having difficulties letting someone else take control ("If you don't mind, I would still do the 'Hardison, run it' thing" Nathan you precious little man, I love you so much). I think it's so nicely done. I mean Sophie has run cons before -- she was the Mastermind behind the First David Job, and she runs their con in the Second David Job as well -- but then she was confident, now she is going through things, on the brink of rediscovering herself for who she is. And of course, it bites her in the ass a little bit.

I absolutely adore Conspiracy Nut Hardison and his fantastic apartment. Set Design did a magnificent job here. I am so fond of Parker asking Eliot about the different things -- the council, the moon landing, Loch Ness monster -- and also very much the bit at the end where he and Hardison answer Parker's questions while he prepares food. That ending bit overall is just absolutely excellent and I love it with my whole heart. Eliot cooking for all of them in Nate's kitchen, giving Parker stuff to try, while Hardison sits there and sips his orange soda out of a wine glass. Meanwhile Nate pouring wine for Sophie, and then going over to her to make sure she is alright. For his slightly more sadistic streak in this season, Nate is so good with Sophie here. And honestly I think this conversation here is one of the reasons why Sophie feels able to leave them for a while. It is Nate's reassurance of "Whatever you need, I'm here for you" that lets her take this leave of absence.

206: THE TOP HAT JOB

D: PETER O'FALLON. W: M. SCOTT VEACH & CHRISTINE BOYLAN. Original Air Date: 19 August 2009.

I adore this episode! The fantastic Veach and Boylan on the keyboard for this one (who, I've had to find out, are both tangentially involved with my latest hyperfixation, SHADOW AND BONE -- Veach having written my favourite episode, and Boylan being married to the showrunner), which is just lovely, because they are both excellent.

First off, I would like to, once again, give all my love to Nadine Haders for that Pizza Guy outfit she put Kane in for the recon sequence. A+ costuming, thank you Nadine.

This episode has so many excellent comedic beats and a wonderful many Hardison/Eliot moments. Sophie trying to set up Nate with their client is absolutely hysterical -- especially considering that she had just been broken up with and had been urging Nate to figure out what it is that is between them since day one. I especially love her attempt at finding things Nate has in common with Jameson: "She's a scientist. And well, you're a bit nerdy, aren't you? ... And food, she works with food. Well, you eat, don't you?" Like, girl, what are you trying to do here, really?

I absolutely adore Hardison and Eliot trying to get into the server room so Hardison can access the data they are trying to get before anyone can get rid of it. Eliot hooking Parker's rope to Hardison's belt, Eliot's complete awe at Hardison's ability to remote access their mark's phone ("You can do that?" Eliot, honey, he can do so much more), the two of them wedged underneath the desk, and then, of course, Eliot's huge smile when Hardison hacks the scanner at the door with the help of his gummy frogs. I love these boys together so much, and this episode has given me so many great moments.

I am also incredibly fond of Nate's magician act. That is a brilliant role and it suits him so well. And I love how genuinely enthusiastic he is about magic.

207: THE TWO LIVE CREW JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS & AMY BERG. Original Air Date: 26 August 2009.

This is an absolutely brilliant episode for so many different reasons. Let me get two things out of the way straight off the bat: 1) Where do I address my "Chaos For Leverage: Redemption" campaign to? and 2) Where do I address my "Apollo Robbins For Leverage: Redemption" campaign to? I want both of them back desperately!

Of course, this episode is important as a major stepping stone in Sophie's character arc. Because of Chaos and his bomb, she has to kill off one of her aliases which is the last thing that then leads to her taking a leave of absence to figure out who she is and who she wants to be. That scene in her apartment with the bomb is also just an excellent moment for the team as a family. The care with which everyone interacts with Sophie, Parker's instant pudding hack, Eliot's instructions on how defuse this situation, Sophie's immediate shift into protector mode once it becomes clear that the only real solution is to run and telling everyone to leave immediately, Nate staying behind and even when Sophie tells him to leave, waiting for her by the apartment door -- they care for each other so much.

I also really love the con-off with Starke's crew. It is so nice to see how similar yet different he and Nate are, and the same goes for the other crew members. I adore their individual confrontations a lot. Eliot's non-fight fight with Mikel Dayan, Parker's thief-off with Apollo, Hardison and Chaos' baby monitor fight. It just really highlights who our beloved characters are and what makes them them, now that we see them, metaphorically, in front of their mirror.

And then, of course, the actual heist is also just amazing. I adore that Starke chooses Nate as his alias to gain access, it is such a great move. Parker and Apollo talking in the ventilation shaft about birds is also just so lovely. And as an admirer of Eliot's arms, I am also very fond of his fight with Mikel. Good choices have been made, I appreciate all of them. The reveal at the end is also absolutely amazing. To beat them they had to save them? Brilliant.

Lastly, of course, Sophie's goodbye at the graveyard with Nate. What a spectacular moment. Also just, the visuals are so beautiful. I love the lighting here. And of course the return of Andy Lange's song, which is just perfect. I am so happy that this is the journey they decided to give Sophie when it became clear that Gina would not be able to be in the full seasons due to her pregnancy. They accommodated her so beautifully and gave Sophie such an amazing moment of character growth. This is why I love this show and the people who made it so much. All my love, to all of them.

208: THE ICE MAN JOB

D: JEREMIAH CHECHIK. W: CHRISTINE BOYLAN. Original Air Date: 02 September 2009.

We love The Ice Man Job! Another fantastic episode by one Christine Boylan who we love in this house. Our very first episode without Sophie being there, and it's a great one. I absolutely adore how they worked in moments with our favourite grifter in a way that so wonderfully accommodates Gina's pregnancy.

I absolutely adore the moments where all of them eventually end up calling Sophie. Parker, hiding underneath the bar after Nate tells her she'll be the grifter in this one, calling her mom Sophie in a panic without wanting the others to know, but still needing her advice and missing her so much. Then Eliot, calling to complain to his mom Sophie about Hardison going overboard again with the grift, needing the knowledge that his concerns are being heard and aren't unfounded, needs to hear the other protector of the family acknowledge his rightful fear that things will go sideways. And of course also Hardison, calling mom Sophie so she can pick him up from the party help him out of the mess he's made, hoping against all hope that she'll be able to help without having to involve Nate. The others both had the luxury to ask Sophie not to tell Nate -- Hardison had no other choice but to let her call it in. Lastly, Nate too, at the end, calling his wife Sophie. And honestly, I love that Sophie drops her phone into her drink after the call, because Nate is the only one not giving her what she wants to hear. The kids, all of them, called with an "I need you" and that is the one thing Nate doesn't give her.

There are many other things in this episode that I love very much. The opening briefing, Parker feeling alone on the big empty couch, trying to sit next to Eliot, but he makes her move. Nate's big DadTM moment of "Eliot, can you please sit next to Parker" and Eliot's very long-suffering oldest child answer "No! I'm sitting here now."

Then of course Eliot and Hardison's two moments -- Eliot telling Hardison "I ain't bailing your ass out" and then when he eventually does anyway, Hardison's smug joy, forcing Eliot to sort-of-hug him back at McRory's. Eliot's unsuccessful attempt to make him helping Hardison a decision forced onto him by Parker, and Parker refusing to accept the "blame" immediately. Their whole dynamic this episode is just so good. Neither Eliot nor Parker being happy with Hardison in this role (Parker's refusal to ride with him in the Ferrari), Eliot proudly watching Parker do her thing over the security camera ("Stuck it!").

Lots of love also to Pasha Lychnikoff as our main Russian goon, who is just fantastic here, our much beloved Lt. Patrick Bonanno, and also Nadine Haders for so many amazing looks, especially on Eliot.

209: THE LOST HEIR JOB

D: PETER WINTHER. W: CHRIS DOWNEY. Original Air Date: 09 September 2009.

Court-room episode, which means we have our friend Chris Downey on the keys here, and he gave us an absolutely excellent introduction for Tara Cole played by the lovely Jeri Ryan. Honestly, the more often I watch this episode, the better it gets. Tara is just so good.

Highlights of this episode include: Sophie's immediate "who died?!" when Nate shows up at her apartment in London, Hardison playing "Where is Waldo Ford," Hardison and Eliot in prison, the first appearance of Nate's lawyer alias Jimmy Papadokalis who wears brilliantly loud and obnoxious suits in outrageous colour-combinations, Hardison stalling Blanchard at court security with his keys, Nate's reveal of Ruth as Kimball's daughter (I am fascinated that he completely drops the character here -- he is just Nate now), and of course, the reveal of Tara at the end.

Honestly, this is such a magnificent episode to introduce Tara's character. We have just watched the team scramble and fuck up without Sophie, and then their next job gets more complicated because of this random lawyer who shows up. And she's so righteous and law-abiding and absolutely not someone they should be taking with them on their job. And Tara plays it perfectly. Her honest try at getting Orson to talk to them, her confusion about her "dogs", her excited smile when she gets to con Blanchard and be a bit dishonest -- it is so good. And then we get that complete 180° when the team finds her in Nate's apartment. Not just visually, but the personality. Her voice drops a bit too. Jeri fucking rocked this introduction. The reveal is so damn good.

210: THE RUNWAY JOB

D: MARC ROSKIN. W: ALBERT KIM. Original Air Date: 13 January 2010.

I have zero interest in fashion but I honest to God love every single one of these characters at fashion week. Fashion!Eliot is absolutely fantastical and I love him. Julien, my beloved. Fashion!Parker is very cute with her braid and even before she gets the model makeover she outshines every single other person at the event. Fashion!Hardison is surprisingly understated but I dig it. Tara as Caprina is also just excellent. And I absolutely, un-ironically adore Fashion!Nate. Jacques is such a character. Nate exchanged the usual "obnoxious and greasy" with "gay," slapped some would-be-French that sounds like German on top of it, and called it a character. And I love it.

I also very much love the three video calls with Sophie in this episode. The kids calling in the beginning, complaining about Tara. I absolutely adore both the "she's hot" moment and Eliot's "...and all the way to Europe?" when Sophie says Nate lets what is good for him walk out the door. Parker's little "I just miss you" before they hang up has me all the way up in my emotions every damn time. Tara calling Sophie to complain about Nate is also just excellent. The whole bit with Nate's "I'm sexy because I'm broken" thing is just *chef's kiss*. And of course Nate's call at the end. I love that Sophie hangs up on him, it is so fair, it is absolutely justified. And I think he knows that too.

So many great other moments too -- Hardison's Steven Seagal comment about Eliot's clothes, Nate's "Julien, sweetheart" and Eliot's little clap before taking the money, Nate and Parker at the mark's house, Eliot and Tara vs the Triads, Eliot and Parker at fashion week together ("It's a fashion show, not Thieves'R'Us"), and of course Tara's "For what it's worth, Sophie was right. You guys are the best I've ever seen ... But no one in the world, is as good as you think you are."

211: THE BOTTLE JOB

D: JONATHAN FRAKES. W: CHRISTINE BOYLAN. Original Air Date: 20 January 2010.

This episode has got to be one of my favourites, if I were forced to chose some. I love a bottle episode, and this one is just magnificent. Excellent client, great mark, fantastic additional characters, wonderful episode for the team. All around just, so good. Not surprising if Frakes and Boylan are at the wheel together, of course.

The addition of Cora is so lovely. I would have loved to see more of her, to be honest. She is such a great character. I love what her presence does to who we see Nate as. I adore when characters get to show new sides of themselves, it's so nice. Also, Nate's comment to Eliot about him not wanting Eliot to like Cora because she's like his niece? Most excellent.

I adore our three police officers too. Mickey, Danny and Johnny are such great additions. I really liked them. How they just went with whatever Nate was planning and in the end decided to just pretend none of this ever happened, it's just so good.

Doyle and the Liams as our villains of the week are also just fantastic. Also I just love Irish accents, it sounds so good. I love to hear it.

Other highlights of this episode include: Tara's "I'm Trish and I'm lonely", the kids going for their individual emergency funds stashed in Nate's place (they are all so fantastically in character, I love it), Nate using his dad's name as his alias, everyone stopping to see if Nate is going to succumb to the booze again, Hardison's excitement about pulling off the wire in under 2h, Hardison faking the weather, Eliot and Parker on safe duty. Also, rewatching this episode, I am absolutely 100% convinced that what Eliot is doing to distract the Liams from Tara conning Doyle, absolutely categorises as flirting. The way he throws that dart at the board and then buys them beer? Mr Spencer, sir, you are flirting with these guys.

212: THE ZANZIBAR MARKETPLACE JOB

D: JEREMIAH CHECHIK. W: MELISSA GLENN & JESSICA RIEDER (GRASL). Original Air Date: 27 January 2010.

The wonder twins with yet another magnificent episode. No surprises here. We have not just the return of Maggie but also of Sterling! We love this!!! (Seriously, I want both of them back in the reboot. I don't care that they're most closely tied to Nate. Bring them back.)

This episode has so many absolutely excellent moments as well. I love the opening sequence in the bar, with them going over possible next clients together, Nate kicking Eliot for flirting with the bartender, and then of course also Sterling walking in. The interaction Nate and Eliot have here is just fantastic.

Sterling: *walks in* Nate: Eliot, I'm gonna ask you not do do anything violent. Eliot: Wha-what are you talking about? I only use violence as an appropriate response. Sterling: Hello, Nate. Eliot: *responds appropriately*

And to think that Sterling only gets beat up here because Mark Sheppard's son was visiting the set that day and wanted to see his dad get beat up by Eliot. We stan one Sheppard Jr.

I very much love the scene where Nate and Sterling go over what they have on Lundy, and then Parker interrupting them out of nowhere, just sitting there on the counter, like she's been there forever (which she probably has). Also just, fantastic clothes on Parker, thank you Nadine. Maggie showing up here is of course also brilliant and I am very fond of Parker making Maggie a fugitive bag. It is so completely adorable. I love my girl so much.

Another favourite moment is, of course, Tara and Eliot getting Chernov to tell them where the sale of the Fabergé egg will take place. Tara not saying a damn thing, Eliot grumpily doing what Tara tells him to ("Do that thing with your eyes that scares people" / "What -- I don't know what you're talking about"), Chernov's complete unease about this whole entire situation, and then of course Tara and Eliot's other interaction:

Tara: What we imagine is always so much better than reality. Eliot, with the tiniest voice possible: Like love? Tara: *just stares at him, confused*

Just, *chef's kiss* this scene.

The scenes in the embassy are also just excellent. Tara and Nate pretending to be a couple, Nate's inability to deal with the idea of Maggie and Alexander, Maggie and Tara hysterically giggling while talking about Nate, Sterling pretending to be drunk (and incredibly gay) to get Parker access to the egg room -- brilliance, all the way through.

I adore Eliot taking charge of the situation once it becomes clear that Maggie and Nate have been taken hostage. Parker doing her magic and switching the bomb with the empty briefcase in the elevators is beautiful. Maggie kissing Nate instead of Lundy in what could have been their final moment and regretting it instantly the moment Parker shows up is excellent.

And the final scene back at McRory's is also just wonderful. The kids watching the news about Sterling with Tara ("I hate this guy" / "Now, you're part of the team"), and Nate talking with Maggie. I adore Maggie in this scene so much. Her and Nate's relationship is so lovely. We know Sophie understands how Nate ticks, but Maggie knows him so well too, still.

213: THE FUTURE JOB

D: MARC ROSKIN. W: CHRIS DOWNEY & AMY BERG. Original Air Date: 03 February 2010.

This episode is so good for so many reasons. First off, I adore Luke Perry (I'm still sad about him) even if he plays creeps like Rand in most everything I've seen him in. He was just so good. Second, Medium Tara is probably my favourite role of hers. It's a lot softer than many of the other characters she's done, and I love it. Also the costuming is just excellent.

But I want to talk about Parker most of all. The scene where Rand cold reads her is so well done. Riesgraf knocked it out of the park here. Also, I love how Nate, as soon as Rand starts approaching and doing his act, barely ever takes his eyes off her. He occasionally glances at Rand, but his attention is on Parker at all times. And it just makes me feel things.

The team coming back to Nate's to find Parker sitting on the floor in front of the couch, crying also makes me super emo. They are all so very careful with her here. Even Tara, who hasn't been with them for that long. I quite like how Eliot and Hardison choose to sit a bit away, giving her space, and Nate carefully approaches and sits closest to her. They are all so good with her here, I love them all so much. And I absolutely adore this part of the conversation:

Tara: So what do we do now? Parker: Cut off his arms. And his head. Yeah. I wanna kill him. Can we make that happen? Eliot: Yeah, I can...I mean, I could...

Also earlier, after Tara acknowledges that Rand is good at what he does, Hardison says "He should be shot." I adore how both our boys would not hesitate to end this man for hurting Parker like this. That's their girl and he went too damn far. And even though Nate suggests a way of retaliation that is less final, he isn't above hurting the man either. Because that's his girl, too:

Hardison: Nate had me rig the table with a mild electrical current. Eliot: You electrocuted him? Nate, smugly: Yes, I did. It helped sell the bit. Parker: I approve. Nate: Thanks, Parker. Eliot: No, her agreeing with you is not a good thing. Nate, whispering to Parker: Thanks.

And add to that the absolute joy each and every one of them have when fucking with Rand to fulfil Tara's predictions? *Chef's kiss.* Absolutely beautiful.

There is so much more absolutely fantastic content in this episode, but I just wanna point out the ending where they meet with the client again. Nate is so good with them here. The way he talks to Jodie about her baby and how she will see her late husband in the child, makes me cry every damn time. Just like Tara says, "Yeah, now I see why you do it," this is why this show is so damn good. It's because of this exactly. Because for one shining moment within so much suck and tragedy, there is goodness and a wrong that has been made right. They help people and it isn't just fleeting momentary relief. They change people's lives for the better. I love this fucking show so much.

214: THE THREE STRIKES JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS. Original Air Date: 10 February 2010.

First half of the second finale! Patrick Bonanno my beloved! I get so sad every time he gets shot here. My man deserves better than this. I love Bonanno so damn much, man. I absolutely adore that Nate goes to see his family at the hospital. Like, this is a cop. The very opposite side of the law Nate and his people operate on. But he goes to see him anyway, because this is their cop. And I love that Bonanno's wife recognises Nate's name. "He wanted to buy you a drink. And then arrest you." That's just so good.

I also absolutely love Richard Kind as Brad Culpepper, the corrupt mayor. I would love to see him back in the reboot, but I doubt there'd be any reasonable explanation why on earth they'd have to see this particular mayor again. I just think Richard Kind is an absolutely fantastic actor.

Anyway, favourite moments. Hardison and Eliot at Bonanno's house is beautiful. I am so fond of how Hardison deals with law enforcement while impersonating law enforcement. He tears them down and builds them back up again, every single time. And I adore how Eliot just smiles at his antics. He crawls around on that carpet with the young cop and Eliot just stands there and smiles. I love them, guys. I really do. Parker pretending to be Brad's pregnant lover with Tara's help is also just most excellent.

And of course: Roy Chappell. Baseball Eliot, my most beloved. There is so much to love about this whole concept. Eliot's reluctance at first because he doesn't like baseball. The discovery that baseball is actually something cool and something he is good at. His absolute childlike joy at the energy drink commercial Hardison made him. His damn hair during the actual game. The sandwich! The enthusiasm about the sandwich. Hardison admitting that the sandwich thing is cool.

I also absolutely love Hardison and Parker as Beavers Fans. The badly photoshopped picture of Dean Devlin and John Rogers as the radio hosts makes me smile so much. So does hearing their voices on the show. Both Hardison and Parker's phone calls to them are also brilliant. Parker speaking Spanish? Marvelous. The two of them demonstrating the Beavers leaving? *Chef's kiss.*

The final showdown with Brad and then the FBI is also just most excellent. Nate going ballistic on Brad because of Bonanno. Hardison and Lucille. Parker giving Lucille a little kiss before they send her to explode as a distraction. Hardison quoting Spock to say goodbye to Lucille. Hardison being pissed at Nate about Lucille. And of course: Jim Sterling, Interpol. The bastard. I love him.

215: THE MALTESE FALCON JOB

D: DEAN DEVLIN. W: JOHN ROGERS. Original Air Date: 17 February 2010.

Second half of second finale! And it's a good one, too. This show has absolutely brilliant finales, lemme tell you.

What do we love about this episode? MUCH. Tara's naked bit is excellent. Eliot and Parker sharing a look after watching Tara's naked bit is even better. Parker turning on the porn channels on the hotel tv is hilarious. Eliot talking to the receptionist about the gym is hysterical ("Ah, the fitness spa. Isn't the Zen Steam Garden divine?" / "Yeah....delicious").

Nate on stairs vs Sterling in elevator is probably the pettiest thing I have ever watched on television and it is absolutely amazing. I don't think anything can ever top this as pettiest moment. It is just so good.

Sterling, of course, is always great fun. I love that he has his own little villain theme that announces him before he even enters the screen. Love a good villain theme. And I adore his moment with FBI Bob outside Brad's hotel room.

Sterling: Name's Bob, right? Bob: Yes, sir. Sterling: You've been here the whole time, Bob? Bob: Yes, sir. Sterling: And nobody's gone in or out, Bob? Bob: No, sir. Sterling: Then would you mind explaining, where the HELL THE MAYOR IS?!

Absolutely perfect.

Nate going back to his place always has me all up in my emotions. Also, I think Sterling here absolutely believes that what he is offering Nate, is good for him. That he can save him from himself or something. They were something like friends at some point, after all. And of course, Nate calling Sophie. She is, of course, unbeknownst to him, already on the way to save his ass. But he calls her and finally tells her exactly what she wanted to hear at the end of The Ice Man Job: "I need you. Not the team, me." Sir. I am emo about you.

And then of course the final con and the reveal of Sophie's return. I absolutely love that Parker's first reaction to Tara possibly betraying them was to try and throw her off the roof. That's my girl (I love Tara, but that was fair). Also just, if you pay attention on the boat scenes, you can see Sophie from as early as Kadjic hearing Nate's offer and then leading Nate and Eliot below deck. If you can pick out her hair and know the colour of her coat from the scene in the helicopter, you know that she is there. And then, below deck, you can see her so many times -- at one point essentially back to back with Nate -- before any of the characters know she's there. And can I just say, I absolutely love Nate's completely shocked face when he hears her voice. Those comedically big eyes are just excellent.

Everyone seeing Sophie again is done so well. Hardison and Eliot's confused "Sophie?" when she walks past. Eliot winking at Sophie after they free Nate. Parker hugging her immediately once her and Tara arrive on the ship. Hardison putting his hand on the small of her back as he passes by her to go down the stairs. I just love them all so much.

And lastly of course, the reveal of the plan, Nate cuffing himself to the railing and making Sterling leave his family alone. What Nate says to them always makes me so emo too: "You guys are the most honourable people I have ever met in my life. You have become my family, my only family. And I will never forget that." John Rogers, sir, we need to have some words once I get this lake out of my eyes. And I obviously can't not mention the kiss. Finally, finally Nate gets his shit together. And she slaps him and it is perfect. And then they leave and he sits down and bleeds and Sterling, for a moment, is genuinely concerned about Nate as a person and not merely about Nate as his only way to nail Kadjic.

Bob: Who the hell is this guy? Sterling: I have no idea. Nate: My name is Nate Ford. And I'm a thief.

Yes. Yes you are, you magnificent bastard.

[image taken from the electricnow website]

[obaewankenope]

Modern day Mummy AU with Eliot Spencer as Rick and Evie’s grandson. The team are in Egypt for an unrelated op, when a Medjai takes one look at Eliot and just goes, “Oh, shit. An O’Connell in Egypt is a recipe for disaster.”

I love this prompt so much, you have no idea!

.

"I hate sand, guys," Hardison said for the fourth damned time in as many minutes. Eliot had been counting. "It's hell on my equipment."

"We know," Eliot drawled, rolling his eyes even as he continued unpacking Hardison's precious equipment.

"I like sand."

Eliot and Hardison both looked at Parker. She frowned. "What?"

Eliot shook his head. "Nothin." Twenty-pounds of crazy.

"Listen up guys!" Nate's voice echoed in the tent they were setting up shop in. In the middle of the desert. "We haven't got much time to get this off the ground!"

They weren't really in the middle of the desert, but anything more than a klik from civilisation might as well have been the middle of nowhere for Hardison. The guy had already complained about how much work he was going to have to do to rearrange satellites for a good connection out here.

Three. Times.

"Nate! We're in Egypt!" Sophie — voice of reason that she was — exclaimed, following behind Nate as their mastermind wandered into the tent already planning the rest of the con. "Gibson isn't going to disappear tonight! We have time. Breathe. Live a little."

Ford wasn't impressed with her plea. Eliot sighed.

"We have less than twenty-four hours before Gibson is selling that diamond he killed innocent people for." Nate bit out, staring at Sophie with that look he got whenever he was trying to emphasise the whole 'do-gooder' thing they had going on. "If we're not ready than Shanier's widow gets nothing and the man who killed her husband walks away with ten-million-dollars."

Eliot placed the case containing some of Hardison's more sensitive equipment down with a silent sigh. Ford was right, obviously, but still.

The guy needed to lighten up a little.

"Why are we camped outside of the city anyway?" Parker asked, missing the tension in the tent entirely and causing everyone to instinctively relax in her unique way of failing to read the room.

It was pleasantly surprising every time she derailed the tension with an honest question like that.

"Because someone—" Nate shot a look at Sophie "—is known in every high end hotel in Cairo and renting rooms in one of the less high end ones isn't possible thanks to him."

Okay, so Eliot might have a bit of history with Cairo.

And the rest of Egypt too.

"Yeah man, why are you known by so many rug sellers in this place?" Hardison asked, looking up from his precious laptop he'd been all but clinging to the entire time. "Like, how many of them have you beaten up for them to know your face and name no matter what?"

Eliot shrugged. "Not that many," he answered vaguely, busying himself with unpacking the equipment from Hardison's cases of tech.

"Maybe they hold a grudge here for like, a really long time?" Parker jumped up on one of the fold-out tables they had set up, her legs swinging over the side in such a childish gesture that Eliot paused to watch her. "Cairo museum still remembers me."

"That's because you stole a priceless artefact without tripping their alarms four times." Hardison pointed out.

"Oh yeah." Parker beamed.

"Listen, it's late, it's going to be dark soon. And I don't know about any of you, but I'm still feeling tired from our flight from Athens." Sophie sidled up to stand beside Nate, closer than normal. It got the guy to look at her and focus on her so Eliot figured, whatever, let her try and butter him up with her charms.

Ford was more than a match for Sophie Devereaux.

"Okay fine." Nate finally sighed in defeat. "We get some rest tonight, but tomorrow we hit the ground running," he said, looking around the tent at them all and everyone nodded in agreement. "Right."

Of course, to get some rest meant setting everything up before they crawled into their sleeping bags. A job that was, unsurprisingly, Eliot's. He was quicker at it than the rest of them anyway. For several reasons.

None of which he'd ever tell his team.

Ever.

* * *

"Eliot! My friend!"

Eliot sighed. He really needed to stop doing that; saying he'd never do something because he always, always ended up doing it. It was like he was asking the universe to contradict him every time.

"Friends of yours?" Ford gave Eliot his best I'm-not-impressed-with-this look.

Eliot smiled. Sort of. It was more of a grimace. An awkward one.

"Of a sort," he muttered, glancing at the Leverage team and then at the group of six black-robed figures sat on horses that had appeared at their tent in the dawn light.

"Long time no see, Penre." Eliot gave the group of riders an awkward wave, shaking his head a little to move his hair out of his face.

Penre Bay gave Eliot a knowing grin.

"Last I heard of an O'Connell in Egypt, my grandfather asked why Allah hadn't let him die before another disaster plagued us!" Penre laughed at the murderous look Eliot threw him. "Come friend! Have you not missed me?"

"O'Connell?" Hardison cut in, before Eliot could tell Penre how much he hadn't missed him. "I thought your real name was Spencer?"

Eliot looked at the hacker. "Spencer is my mothers maiden name." He shrugged. "Less problems that way."

"Less prob— dude! You're an O'Connell!" Hardison did a double-take, waving a hand at Eliot. "You're treasure hunter royalty my man!"

Penre laughed.

Damn but Hardison didn't even know the half of it. Royalty. Literally.

Even through reincarnation it counted.

"I suppose they did not know of your family, my friend?" Penre asked innocently and Eliot glared at the Medjai.

"Ya think."

"Ah, my apologies," he said, not looking at all apologetic. If anything, Penre's smile grew. "But I believe your people may need our assistance."

Eliot groaned. "Now what?"

Penre's smile dropped and he became serious. "The creature," he said gravely, "the man you are after is attempting to wake it."

"Fuck."

Penre nodded. "My sentiments also, my friend."

Eliot shook his head. "I'm gonna need some guns."

"Guns? You?" Ford looked at Eliot, frowning in confusion and annoyance at everything. The mastermind always did hate not being in control. "You hate guns and what— what is this about some— some creature? Eliot explain."

"Aw man," Eliot shook his head again, "you're not gonna believe a word of what I say until you see it for yourselves."

And maybe not even then, he thought.

Every time he came to Egypt, every damned time, something always happened. His grandfather and grandmother had definitely left a long shadow of chaos in this country. It was like the sands remembered Carnahan and O'Connell blood and pitched a damned fit any time one of them dared step foot in Egypt.

Eliot sighed again. Maybe it did.

"I really wish we hadn't taken this job," he muttered to himself as the Medjai climbed out of their saddles and joined the Leverage team in the tent to talk strategy.

Ford definitely wasn't pleased about the added variables — heck, neither was Eliot! — but the ex-insurance investigator took it with more grace than he would have a year ago. Thankfully.

Still, that didn't mean their case would end well. Idiots were a never-ending supply and all it took was one fool with just enough knowledge to bring hell on earth; again.

Just once Eliot would like to visit Egypt without his family history causing problems.

Keep dreaming Eliot, he thought, keep on dreaming.

[somebodyhelpthenotdeadfreds]

Leverage of Tomorrow!

Here’s some cracky goodness for @marywisdom‘s birthday today! Hope you enjoy this mess, it was fun to write!

“You’re all wrong,” Mick declared, setting down his beer bottle and fixing the team with a look. “You’re going about getting the spear back the wrong way.”

Sara folded her arms and looked back at him, nodding for him to continue. “Then what do you suggest we do, Mick?”

Mick grinned, leaning forward in his chair. “Fight fire with fire.” He ignored the eye rolls and muttered comments. He knew he was right. “Hey, let me finish, ‘cause I don’t hear anyone else coming up with the good ideas. So listen to me, for once.”

He cleared his throat and continued. “The Legion is just a bunch of liars and thieves, and sadly, I’m the only liar and thief here, and I can’t do it all by myself. The only way you’re gonna get that spear is to steal it back. But you guys suck at being the bad guys.”

“So, again,” Sarah said, entertaining his motion for the moment, “What do you suggest we do?”

Mick stood up, and nodded over to where Ray was sitting in his chair. “Haircut, you’re with me. We’re heading out to Seattle, early 2000’s.”

“Sure!” Ray said, scrambling to his feet, always eager to help. “But, uh, why?”

Mick smiled. “I’m gonna find some people who actually know how to get shit done.”

When Sophie Deveraux opened her team's office door after the knock, she wasn’t necessarily expecting to see two men standing there, tall enough to tower over her, but she plastered on a winning smile and decided to play along.

“Can I help you two gentlemen? Do you have an appointment?” she asked. The one with the puppy-dog eyes brightened. Naïve, she noted, probably rich. Familiar face, too.

“Oh!” he said, smiling along. “We’d like to speak to an Eliot Spencer, please.”

The other man sighed, exasperated, but Sophie didn’t let anything register on her face that she didn’t want to show. Instead, she blinked and appeared slightly confused.

“I’m sorry, there’s no Eliot Spencer here,” she said. Mick scoffed out a laugh.

“Relax, we’re friends.”

Sophie finally let her expression dim. “That’s not really as comforting an expression as you may think it is.” She turned her head over her shoulder and said, very decidedly, “Eliot! a...friend of yours and his companion are here to see you.”

“Who is - I’m not here!” a voice yelled back. Mick stepped aside from Sophie and right through the doorway, not waiting to be invited in. Ray opened his mouth to apologize when Mick yelled back:

“Hey, Spencer, how’s that burn doing?”

Immediately the door to the kitchenette opened and Eliot came out, grinning. “Hot damn, how you doin’, Rory?”

Mick broke out into a grin and shook his hand, pulling him in and they shared a hug for approximately a nanosecond before pulling away. Ray was still a little stunned but Sophie nodded to him and he stepped inside. “Um, what - ”

“Haircut, Spencer,” Mick said as an introduction, turning back to catch back up with Eliot.

“My name - my name is Ray. Ray Palmer,” Ray stuttered. Sophie turned to him with a surprised look.

“You - you aren’t related to a Sidney Palmer, are you?” she asked.

“Unfortunately yes.”

“Oh,” she said, pursing her lips. “I - may have lifted a few things from him some years back. Just a few small diamonds, I was searching to find a piece of myself for a role - ”

“...What?”

Leaving Ray to Sophie for the moment, Mick turned back to Eliot. “Thought you weren’t a team player.”

“Thought the same about you,” Mick fired back, leaning back on the doorframe, shaking his head to get the hair out of his face. “So, what’s the job?”

“Who says I didn’t just miss you?” Mick joked.

“Yeah, I’m a real catch, Rory. But you got a job for us, don’t you?”

Mick grinned, full of teeth. “Yeah. You guys ever steal...time?”

Hardison was actually going to pass out from sheer joy.

Time. Travel.

Honest-to-god time travel. Interdimensional travel. Literal, actual superpowers. He was in heaven, and the only thing that would make this better was playing around with technology from a hundred years into the future. Amazingly, he was able to find a plug to connect his computer not on the Waverider and started trying to work his way into the system.

But he almost had a heart attack when he heard a chipper, computerized voice start talking directly to him.

“Can I assist you, Mr. Hardison?”

“Uhhhh,” he stuttered, looking around him frantically for the source of the voice. “Maybe. Who - who are you?”

“I’m Gideon. I’m the captain’s personal assistant,” the voice declared. “And I find your attempt at hacking into my servers quite amusing.”

“Uh, sorry, I didn’t - I didn’t mean to, uh, offend you or nothing. I mean, I’m just really into all of-” he gestured around him, wondering if she could see him “-this.”

“If you are curious, you could simply ask, Mr. Hardison, instead of hacking into the softare without permission.”

“I - I apoloize,” Hardison siad, sitting back odwn on his chair. “Could you tell me aobut this ship and, uh, all the tech stuff?”

“What in particular?”

Hardison grinned outright. “Everything.”

Parker narrowed her eyes from where she was watching in the doorframe before walking away, running to catch up with Eliot and jump onto his back. “Eliot!”

The man in question grunted, but adjusted her position so it was easier for him to support her. “Jesus, Parker, we’ve talked about this: I need a five-second warning when you do this.”

“You’ll catch me anyway,” she said back, then turned back to the pressing subject at hand. “Eliot, Hardison found a computer that can talk. What does he need us for, now?”

“Parker,” Eliot soothed. “Don’t worry. He needs us. Please - please don’t be jealous of an AI.”

“Fine,” Parker said, pouting as she held on tighter. “Where are you going?”

“Sparring off with Sara,” Eliot said, hoisting her up a little higher as he walked on down the hallway. “Do you think I’ll win?”

“Hmm,” Parker thought, resting her head on his shoulder. “First round doesn't count. I’ll bet afterwards.”

Team Leverage took up one side of the flight deck, and the Legends took up the other half.

“I can't believe you recruited thieves to help us,” Martin said to Mick with an eyeroll. Parker blinked at him for a few minutes, then turned to Sophie.

“Was that the insult?” she said in a stage whisper. “Because - because we are thieves. I don’t get it.”

“Do you have his wallet?” Sophie asked back, a slight smile pulling at her lips. Parker nodded.

“I’ve lifted a wallet, a knife, a couple tools, a Rolex, and a bag of Fritos.”

Sophie gave her a small high-five and then they turned their attention back to the briefing Sara Lance was giving.

“The main heads of the Legion are Eobard Thawne, Damien Darhk, and Malcolm Merlyn.”

Eliot’s head snapped up, then grimaced from where Sara had gotten him good at the base of his neck. “Did you say Malcolm Merlyn?”

Sara raised an eyebrow at him, then crossed her arms, hissing at the sting at her shoulder.

(The sparring match had been good for both of them, not having to hold back. But maybe they should have waited to do it until after the con was completed.)

“Do you know him?” she asked dryly.

“Seriously, Merlyn?” Eliot bit out, spitting the blood out of his mouth as his foot remained firmly on Merlyn’s neck, causing him to choke out a curse. “You - you run the goddamn Legion of Assassins, and you sent me some third-rate ones. I deserve better than that.”

Merlyn growled and tried to get up, but Eliot just added more pressure as he caught his breath.

“If - if I’m not honest, you aren't gonna improve.”

Eliot blinked. “Maybe.”

Nate Ford finally spoke up, addressing his team. “Alright guys, I have a plan. But I need to know how to knock out a guy with superspeed. Multiple times.”

Mick cleared his throat after swallowing his beer. “We’ve got these, uh, things that-”

“We are not lending some thieves that you just happen to know borrow any of the Waverider-” Martin’s exasperated interruption was cut off when he caught sight of Eliot’s hard glare.

“‘Scuse me,” Eliot said, his tone a few shades short of a snarl. “But your teammate was speaking.”

“Well, I-”

“Isn’t he a part of this here team? Why don’t y’all shut your mouths for a second and let the man talk?” Eliot snapped, and he leaned back against the wall of the Waverider and nodded to Mick. “Keep talking.”

Mick nodded back. “Thanks. We’ve got these things that can knock you out with a flash or something.”

“Does it look like this?” Parker asked, holding up the device in question. The entire Legends crew stared at her in disbelief.

“We keep those in our rooms, under lock and key.”

Parker shrugged, handing it over to Nate. “They were bad locks, what can I say?” she said innocently, flashing a grin at Mick, who returned it.

Nate cleared his throat, addressing his team again. “Alright, plan, plan. I think we’re going to go with a time warp.”

The Leverage crew nodded while the Legends looked confused. Nate only continued. “Okay, Sophie, I’m thinking Russian.”

Sophie’s eyes lit up. “Of course, Nate, nothing screams ‘seductive femme fatale’ like a well done Russian accent. There was this one time in Switzerland-”

“Yes, thank you, Sophie, but we need to continue,” Nate said, cutting her off. She gave him a narrow-eyed glare that meant that he would be getting an earful later that night. “Now, Hardison-”

“Comms are all set up,” Hardison announced, tapping away on his laptop. “We should have a standard connection, and I’ve set up all our fake IDs, except for Eliot, ‘cause, well, one of them already knows you.”

Eliot nods, surveying the room again with narrowed eyes, daring anyone to interrupt. No one did.

“...And if at any point we need to contact anyone on board,” Nate finishs, directing this point to the Legends. “We’ll call Mick.”

“But-”

Eliot turned up the glare and Nate Heywood went silent. Nate Ford cracked his knuckles and sighed. “Yeah, should only take us about four days.”

“Four days? We’ve been tracking them for months,” Jax said in disbelief. “You can’t just-”

“Yeah, you guys did all the surveillance work, thanks. Shouldn’t be too bad.”

The Legends all silently disagreed.

Four days later

Eliot came hustling back onto the Waverider, tossing the Spear of Destiny onto the floor and straightening out his neck, ignoring the bruises and dried blood on his face and arms. “Here you go.”

Martin actually dropped his glass on the ground and shattered it. Everyone’s jaw dropped as the rest of the Leverage crew, sans Parker, climbed back onto the Waverider. Nate stretched his neck as well, letting out a sigh.

“That was fun, got your spear back.”

Jax broke the ice first. “How - how did you-”

“Oh, it was just marvelous,” Sophie drawled as she came up behind Nate. “Time loop scheme, of course.”

“Classic,” Mick said, raising his beer bottle in celebration. The other Legends just looked confused. Nate rolled his eyes.

“Sophie, they’re not criminals, they don’t know the time-loop con.”

Hardison came up behind them, leaning against one of the chairs. “Basically, it’s a Groundhog Day situation. Make the mark think they’re stuck living the same day over and over.”

“Took four tries,” Nate yawned, itching for a drink. “Honestly, I thought it would have taken longer, Thawne looked like he was going to crap his pants when he thought they broke time.”

“And poor Damien, I had to spill his coffee on his suit over four times. Must have a second-degree burn right now,” Sophie sighed, blowing her hair out of her face. The Legends were still too stunned to say anything. Hardison suddenly straightened up.

“Oh, almost forgot, we got somethin’ else,” he grinned, then called over his shoulder. “Hey, Parker, you coming or what?”

“Here!” Parker squealed, rushing onto the Waverider. And she was dragging someone behind her...someone who looked pissed off, yet amused...

“Leonard?” Sara screeched in disbelief, and everyone’s jaws hit the floor again while Mick spit his beer out onto the floor. “You-”

“Did everyone miss me?” he drawled, letting Parker pull him all the way to the center of the room.

“How - how -”

“I stole him!” Parker grinned. “I mean, I stole a whole orphanage once and got them all ice cream, but Len was just there. You were - you tell them,” she directed to Len, and he grinned back at her.

“Yeah, so when the Oculus blew I kind of got sucked into the time stream and it just so happened that the Legion pulled me out first. Thanks for looking, by the way. How do you think the Legion came up with half their plans, they had me on background duty. Armchair planning. The worst,” he half-groaned, rolling his eyes for effect, before smiling again. “And now I’m back, I hope you still have room,” he said, directing a short glare over to where Nate and Amaya were standing, and they shifted uncomfortably.

Len noted this with satisfaction and walked right over to Mick, who had his arms folded and his eyes narrowed. Len tried the smooth smile to be annoying. “Miss me?”

“That was goddamn stupid, you know that?” Mick snapped, referring to the whole affair at the Oculus. Before Len could respond, Mick was already talking again: “You do that again, I’ll kill you myself. They gave your room away.”

Len winked. “Nice to know you missed me. And good thing I was sleeping in yours anyway, then.”

There was a choking noise from behind them, it sounded like either Ray or Martin. Len was sure he heard Sara giving a thumbs-up.

“Well, our work here is done,” Nate announced to his crew, and they all said their goodbyes the Leverage team, and walked off the Waverider. All was well.

“...Parker, did you steal a billionaire’s wallet?”

“He doesn’t NEED it, Eliot, he’s a billionaire. He could buy a billion wallets.”

[midnightluck]

Oh oh oh what about Leverage and Magic Kaito? (I just really really wanna see it. I mean I know we talked about it but I wanna see it. :P)

“Get out of there, Parker,” Eliot growls into the earbud, and he gets only silene in response. “Hardison? Hardison!”

“How many times I gotta tell you,” Hardison’s voice says, tight and strained. “If I’m not in front of my computer then I can’t track you.”

Eliot growls and starts down the hallway, and Hardison says, “No, wait, Eliot! You have to stay there! Parker’s got exit routes, just trust our girl, okay? We need you there for the next stage!”

“Thought you couldn’t track us,” Eliot bites out, but he spins and heads back the way he came. And then he spins again to start pacing a tight circuit.

“I can’t,” Hardison says. “I just know you, man. And I know Parker, and she’ll be fine.”

This plan was riskier than normal, Eliot knows, which is why he’s so on edge, and Parker going quiet isn’t helping.

Then there’s finally a voice that’s not Eliot’s or Hardison’s over the earbuds, but it’s not Parker’s either. “Oh,” it says, quiet and male, “I didn’t know there was anyone in here already. My apologies.”

Eliot breaks his pacing and heads towards the door to the stairs, and Hardison says, “Hey–hey, wait, are you in the vents? Did you–is someone else in the vents with you?”

“It’s okay,” Parker says, and her voice is calm and even, for all the help that is. Eliot grunts and walks faster. “They’re not my vents.”

“That’s true,” the stranger says, and it’s tinny and far away, but there’s an accent, Eliot thinks, just a trace, just a slurring on the r. “I don’t think that folder is yours either, though, and that hasn’t stopped you. Still, I didn’t mean to intrude.”

“The vents aren’t yours either,” Parker points out, and there’s the rusting of fabric against metal that means she’s moving.

“They are not,” the stranger agrees.

“And you’re wearing white,” she continues. “Why would you wear white to crawl through air vents?”

“The downside to having a reputation,” the stranger says lightly, “is that you have to maintain said reputation. Kaitou KID, at your service.”

Eliot stops, one hand on the door to the staircase. “KID?” he repeats.

“Looking it up now,” Hardison says, and Eliot bites back a response about not being near a keyboard because he’s seen what Hardison can do with just his cell phone.

“Famous jewel thief,” Eliot says anyway, because he’s heard of KID. Everyone in the retrieval business has heard of Kaitou KID, and everyone who knows his reputation also knows that his number one rule is that no one gets hurt. “Probably here for the diamond.”

“Do you want the diamond?” Parker asks because of course she does. Eliot huffs out a sigh and stays where he is. He’s got about a minute before he’s gotta book it back the way he came for the next stage anyway.

“Not today,” KID answers, and there’s more fabric against metal. “I’m just on recon. Couldn’t take it without a notice, after all. Reputation, you see.”

“Tell him it’s fake,” Eliot demands, heart pounding. “Tell him what we’re here for.”

Parker makes a displeased little sound and Eliot has to stand there and count seconds in his head and hope Parker sees the logic in it because she is their mastermind, after all. Then, thankfully, Hardison backs him up. “Professional courtesy, mama,” he says. “Wouldn’t you wanna know it was fake before going through the trouble?”

Eliot can almost hear her tilt her head and think it through, and he’s pretty sure the delay is caused by her response of no, it’s about the break in, not the prize clashing with Sophie’s other people might have different reasons, but she finally says, “It’s fake,” and Eliot turns and runs back to his position.

There’s a pause and Eliot counts it in footsteps–one two three four fi–“Is it,” KID says, calm and pleasant.

“Yes,” Parker says. “The owner lost the real one a couple years ago in a poker game, and he had a fake made so no one would know. The one here is just glass.”

And their client had found out and been fired and threatened over it, but this guy doesn’t need to know that. “In position,” he murmurs instead, and just in time, too, as the mark comes around the corner.

“You’ll forgive me if I don’t believe you,” KID says to Parker, and Eliot controls his breathing and doesn’t let his shoulders hitch at all. He needs a smooth gait, after all, and he brushes past their mark in the hallway just as planned and keeps walking.

“I don’t care if you do or don’t,” Parker says. “The voices in my head told me it was professional courtesy to tell you.”

Eliot rounds the corner and heads for the server room. “Parker,” he sighs. It’s not the first time she’s called them that, and she’s doing it on purpose.

“Ah,” KID says. “Right. Well. Thank you very much, miss. I’ll just be on my way then.”

“Okay,” Parker says, and there’s silence on the earbuds for a handful of seconds. Then she says, “Oops.”

“Oops?” Hardison repeats. “What oops? You don’t get to oops right now, Parker; talk to us.”

“Do you want to crawl backwards or should I?” KID says with a quiet embarrassed cough.

“I don’t know,” Parker says. “I’ve never been stuck in the vents before.”

“Neither have I,” KID says, “but at least I have charming company.” There’s a beat and Eliot can just imagine the look Parker is giving him. “There was an exit just a few feet back,” he then sighs. “If you could just give me enough room–” and then there’s some truly worrying scraping noises, and some muttering that’s becoming too quiet to hear, but seems to be about hang gliders going backwards.

“You good, Parker?” Hardison asks as Eliot uses the swiped card key to get into the server room. He’s being filmed now so he can’t risk talking, but he can listen.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Parker says, and then a long pause later, “He’s gone.”

Eliot bites back on a good and puts the thing Hardison gave him into the computer box slot, and Parker says, thoughtful and sudden, “I like him.”

No. No.

“You want me to look him up?” Hardison asks, and no, Eliot knows where this is going.

“He might be helpful,” Parker says. “Even Eliot likes him.”

That’s not true at all. Just because he trusts in Parker and maybe in a no-harm reputation and didn’t overreact doesn’t mean he likes the thief.

“Sure, I’ll see what I can find,” Hardison says, and Eliot lists Japanese, teenager, highly educated, trained, and apprentice in his head to share later, after the loading bar does its thing. “Maybe he’ll be helpful.”

Parker makes her disagreeing noise. “I think he’s looking for something,” she says. “He’s not like me. He’s doing it for a reason, so maybe he needs some leverage.”